Murda' one

Despite my sister's latest marketing ploy of granting free rent to new tenants while unreasonably raising that of current tenants, the apartment building across the street remains cheaper. No, not the assisted living home for non-threatening lunatics -- I have a lot of friends there!

Anywho...

As a consequence, a few tenants curious about a better life outside of the Manor (my sister calls them "refugees") forget they've signed over their lives and first borns and move across the street (READ YOUR LEASES!!!!) . If you think Saddam Hussein's mass graves are bad, just peek into our incinerator!

There's a warrant out for my sister -- again -- this time for the homicide of a former tenant, an elderly lady who, unable to afford financing the first-months of new tenants, moved across the street. Her body, unworthy of even being slaughtered on our property, was found in the trash in her new building. D. insists she was warned; she says always wears a cat on her sweatshirt to remind tenants what happens to curious little cats.