At least her button nose is Heavenly.

One summer, my sister's creative streak provoked her to open a bohemian ranch for artists willing to pay egregious rent. I remember when she was sitting around in a beret, a few years after its completion, and decided to form a Christian Scientist rap group. Unfortunately, everyone thought she was crazy.

She convinced them that au contraire, they were the crazy ones, had them institutionalized, and began a solo career as "Land Lady Bling." Since she wasn't handed this opportunity on a silver platter, she predictably failed -- after recording a video of herself being crucified, rising to the Heavens, and sitting at both the right and left hands of the Father.